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On a more serious note...

I'm not really enjoying this time of year.

So, for the past couple of nights, I have been dreaming about Skinner Boy. From everyday occurrences, to romantic renewals, to weird scenarios. The drill sargent one was kind of amusing, actually. At any rate, I think I have been doing so well since I have been insanely busy and I literally have no money to go shopping. I have a credit card I use at a nearby grocery store. Well, Cheap Old Bastard (my Dad) and his girl needed to get more photo album pages since they are finally going through old boxes of photos, and I went shopping with them. Yeppers, definitely assaulted by all of the disgusting Valentine's Day paraphernalia.

It made me kinda sad. Damn.

I don't know if I miss Skinner Boy, if I miss the intimacy, or miss the chunk of my daily routine now gone. All I know is I'm missing something.

In other news, I had my ultrasound last Thursday. (Just a friendly reminder, I am not pregnant) Sometime this week I have to make a doctor's appointment to see what, if anything, popped up, or is it just to do with defunct hormones. *sighs* Normally, I wouldn't even bother worrying. What is the point of worrying? I'm a "take it as it comes" kind of gal. But, with all the assignments that I really don't give a flying... well, you get the point... from school, trying to get my car safetied, wondering where the *bleep* I'm going to be student teaching come March (damn Education office), money woes, possible health woes, and just feeling plain pathetic..... I'm finding myself shutting down fast.

Sometimes I wished I still smoked up. Sometimes I wish I could live up to the "slacker" image I put forth. No one would expect anything from me, I wouldn't have to do anything, I can be as selfish and harmful as I wanted... and I may be happy because of it.

Comments

( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
dreamfilled
Feb. 10th, 2004 06:24 pm (UTC)
Re: Words of Wisdom?
*raises an eyebrow* Is this more proof that you're old? *giggles*

Just kidding. I agree with you completely. I was just in a frumpy mood that day, that's all.

As always, thank you for your words.
(Deleted comment)
(Anonymous)
Feb. 10th, 2004 04:23 am (UTC)
smoking up is good for the soul.
dreamfilled
Feb. 10th, 2004 02:36 pm (UTC)
*grins and shakes head* Nice answer. *laughs*
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )